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DID YOU GROW UP UNLOVED-TRAITS YOU MIGHT RECOGNISE

Did you know that our upbringing has a profound impact on who we become.

Signs-of-Growing-Up-Unloved

If you grew up in an unloving environment, you may have developed traits you didn’t even realise stemmed from those experiences.

Personal Development is about so many things, from developing your mind to developing your attitude towards life, developing your skills and overall becoming a better human being. You may think this stuff maybe really intuitive, simple and common sense. Its anything, but just a common practice. Our personalities are formed of a complex mix of cultural factors, conditioning, the environment, the era that we grew up in and certainly few genetically inherited characteristics. A few characteristics which I have noticed closely, with people who grew up in families which had less love and support are as below:

  • These kinds of people are rebellious. They would like to do things differently because they maybe seeking attention, they want to be different and not be like everybody else. When they grow up, especially in their teenage, they at times become troublemakers. They just defy orders!
  • These kinds of people are hyper-vigilant. They pay attention to every little detail, maybe because when they were growing up, they did not feel like they could just relax. They would always feel like there is volatility at home, walking on eggshells, no sense of certainty and they were never comforted. Consequently, their brains get hardwired to become hyper-vigilant.
  • They find it very difficult to trust people. So, if your own family has let you down when you were growing up, when you grow up you inherit that mindset that you cannot rely upon people.
  • These people are fiercely independent. As much as possible, they hate relying on people. They want to try and do everything themselves, because in the past they already had numerous experiences where they have relied on people and they have been led down. They live with continuous disappointing experiences.
  • They are sceptical about people. They know that people can be good, largely they don’t see people being benevolent. They often carry this perception that most people cannot be naturally good.
  • They have distrust of authority. It goes back to point of being rebellious. Generally, they do not give that respect to people in authority, unlike others. They struggle to listen to teachers, parents etc. They believe that most of these people who have got positions may have done something wrong, because they have seen an imperfect system. They have seen in their family that people who have authority, did not ever deserve that authority.
  • These people tend to be emotionally aloof and are very sensitive to betrayal. The moment they see signs of betrayal, they will quickly flip.
  • They have an excessive need to prove themselves. During their childhood, they did not get the acknowledgement, validation and approval of people whom they looked up to for being loved. They realise that only by doing something extraordinary, would they be given validation.

Mind Power – Is Thinking Real?

Mind Power – Is Thinking Real ?

People have limiting beliefs all the time. Problem is that when you have a belief, you think it’s the truth… but its not, its just a belief! Beliefs can blind you into thinking what you believe is truth and people can be made to believe anything. We know that there are terrorists who have been conditioned to believe that by killing people they will be going to the heaven. What makes the human mind so dangerous is that it can be primed to believe anything. You can brainwash and indoctrinate anyone who is not self-aware. And majority of people are not self-aware and that’s why are prone to indoctrination and brain wash. That ways you will always be a slave to someone’s else’ agenda and can never be a master of your own destiny because you cannot see what is going on. We have to take control of our most important asset- THE MIND!
Your mind can not just make you rich or poor but can also make you fit or unhealthy. Thinking is real and is powerful! And if you are an unconscious thinker then you have a problem-you are not even aware of what you think or believe, not even aware of why & what you are doing.
What is the difference between a man and an animal? If I throw a ball, my dog will run after the ball. Do you think my dog thinks that she is running after a ball? No, its just an instinct. She is doing the act without being conscious of the act. That is the fundamental difference between humans and animals. Animals are not conscious of what they are doing. Humans have the ability of being conscious of what they are doing. Ask yourself why you do what you do? Why have you chosen certain things in your life? Why do you have the biases that you have? Does the pet in our house tell us how to live or we tell them how to live? It’s because we tell the pet that we are of a higher consciousness than you so we will tell you how to live. Fair enough! So, think now from humans’ point of view. People who have higher consciousness than us rule us and tell us how to live- I am your master! If you have a master, then you are not conscious. Its just like we have the dominion over the animal world by virtue of our consciousness, in the human world, those humans who are more conscious than us have dominion over us! I HAVE MENTORS, I DO NOT HAVE MASTERS! If you cannot express yourself, cannot live freely, cannot do what you want to do, then you are living under a master. They make decisions for you. You don’t mind making decisions for your pet, your masters don’t mind making decisions for you. This is the hierarchy… the lower you are, the more people make decisions for you. A degree doesn’t facilitate consciousness, you may have many and yet be low down on the socio-economic ladder. We have to elevate our consciousness if we have to have dominion over our own life.

UNLOCK THE DANGEROUS IN YOU

UNLOCK THE DANGEROUS IN YOU

Can a person be good and dangerous at the same time?

That’s an important question to ponder.

Why?

Because all our lives, everyone tells us to be nice, good, etc.

But when others take advantage of those ‘good’ people, they feel cheated and unmotivated.

overcoming challenges

A person needs to be good and dangerous, not in a harmful or aggressive way, but in a way that commands respect and prevents others from taking advantage of them.

Dangerous not in a way to be harmful to others, but being the type of person that can’t be harmed, a person that can’t be messed with. There needs to be an edge to a person’s personal development. As long as people are fearful, they will settle into only small goals and small visions. All kinds of elementary education teaches people to be good and nice but you can’t be messed with. This will hinder you to become powerful.

I look at it in a positive way, “If you are dangerous, you are revered, you’re respected”. Like, Lion as an animal is dangerous. But when you go to the Zoo, you que upto see the Lion, you don’t want to que upto see the most domesticated animals. You may like and trust the domesticated animal, but if you really want to get the job done and really want to see the powerful and magnificent being, you que upto see the dangerous animal. Revered as someone we admire and respect from distance.

The problem is that our entire societal structure is making people to be obedient and compliant who just follow without asking questions. It has produced people who cant think for themselves, are powerless and especially when there are times of crises, these people are destroyed.

Think about it….

Men & WOMEN who have benefitted from the feminist movement

Men & WOMEN who have benefitted from the feminist movement

You may have heard about the feminist movement, which started a few years ago in the West…and it’s now spread everywhere across the world. Globally there are two groups of people that have been advantaged and two groups who have been disadvantaged from the feminist movement.

The advantaged group are the High-Value Men. They have so many choices with women that do not know what to do with it.
The second advantaged group are the Average Women. They have become more liberated


The disadvantaged groups are -The Average Men. Women are brutally punishing the average men. That’s why the consumption of pornography is so high now. It is telling us that men are now finding sexual gratification through a screen because they have been rejected out there in the world.
The second disadvantaged groups are the High Value Women. They want to be with the High value men, but these men don’t want to give up their independence for the high value women.

That’s why the high value women are having to stay single. She has worked very hard on her career and her degrees but the high value man doesn’t care about that. This is because the perceived value in men and women are very different. A lot of high value women who worked hard on their career, degree, the BMW, they thought that the men would respect them and love them for it, but men don’t care about such things, do they? The only time these men care of her career and her income is when you are looking for her to provide this for you.

Empowering India’s Future: Investing in Women to combat the lack of Property Rights for Women in India

In the vibrant tapestry of India, the struggle for gender equality is an ongoing battle. Among the myriad challenges faced by women, the lack of property rights stands out as a significant hurdle. In a country where tradition often clashes with modernity, women continue to be marginalized when it comes to property ownership.
Property rights are not merely about owning land or assets; they symbolize economic independence, social status, and the ability to make decisions that shape one’s life. Unfortunately, women in India are frequently denied these rights due to entrenched patriarchal norms, discriminatory laws, and societal biases.
The issue of property rights for women in India is deeply rooted in cultural and legal frameworks that perpetuate gender disparities. Despite progressive legislation such as the Hindu Succession Act, which grants equal inheritance rights to daughters, implementation remains a challenge in many parts of the country. Moreover, customary practices often override statutory laws, leaving women vulnerable to exploitation and disenfranchisement.
To address this issue, concerted efforts are needed at various levels. Firstly, there must be greater awareness and advocacy to challenge societal norms and stereotypes that perpetuate gender inequality. Education plays a crucial role in empowering women to assert their rights and navigate legal complexities.
However, investing in women goes beyond legal and policy measures. It requires a cultural shift that values and promotes gender equality. Women must be encouraged to support and uplift each other, recognizing that their collective empowerment is essential for progress. Instead of competing, women should collaborate, mentor, and advocate for one another, creating a supportive ecosystem where every woman can thrive.
Lack of property rights for women in India is a glaring injustice that impedes their autonomy and hampers societal progress.

By investing in women’s empowerment through education, legal reforms, and fostering a culture of solidarity, we can bridge this gap and create a more equitable society where every woman’s rights are respected and upheld.
Women are not here to fight with each other; they are here to promote each other!!

MAIN CONTACTS EVERY PERSON MUST HAVE FOR SUCCESS

MAIN CONTACTS EVERY PERSON MUST HAVE FOR SUCCESS

Success is never a SOLO game! Having the right people by your side will assist you to win again & again.

List of people that any ambitious person seeks to have, to make an incredible team. They should have same values as you, but complimentary skills to you. For us to be able to propel our achievements forward one has to have this incredible team.

1. A CAREER MENTOR

Someone who has the results that you want in your career or your finances. This mentor will articulate your path.

2. A LAWYER

A commercial lawyer is worth their weight in gold. One gets fixated to pay to a commercial lawyer but many don’t realise that when you are a successful individual, when you are buying investments and assets or running a business, you face a lot of risks. That’s where having a good commercial lawyer by your side means that you are well prepared to mitigate these risks arising out of your works.

3. A FINANCIAL ADVISOR

A trusted professional who understands your current financial situation, understands your future financial goals and has numerical skills and analytical abilities to guide you in a way to get you from where you are to where you want to be, with the minimum risk possible.

4. A BANK MANAGER

Somebody who understands your transaction history and your financial affairs and is able to guide you and build a relationship and is able to assist you as and when you need them.

5. A FINANCE MANAGER

To understand how loans and credit works and also you understand how to maximise your situation to get the best leverage possible and also someone who can help you understand how to lower the risk of borrowing money.

6. A TRUSTED DOCTOR

A medical professional who not just has the understanding of medicine but also has understanding of health & nutrition and understands your family history and your health ailments and guide you likewise.

7.  A PERSONAL TRAINER

To understand your fitness goals and body type and then give you advice on best fitness and exercise regime for you and right nutrition that you need to help you achieve your fitness goals.

8. A LIFE COACH

He is very different than a mentor. They facilitate self-awareness and expose any self-deception where you are telling yourself lie and preventing yourself from being able to achieve your goals.

6-things that successful people do not waste time on

6-things that successful people do not waste time on

1. LOW VALUE TASKS
Tasks that are not in alignment with your passion, tasks that do not being you any joy, tasks that are not going to bring you growth or wealth!
Find ways to delegate those tasks. Don’t be a time spender and be a time investor!

We have a limited amount of time on earth and we do not want to spend or exchange time for activities that are simply waste of our time. Most average people spend their time in frivolous tasks which do not enhance their quality of life or their career. Successful people treat their time as precious and they only exchange it for things that bring them those things. These are called high value tasks.

2.GOSSIP
Poor people talk of people, average people talk about events and great people talk about ideas!
For successful people, the attention is not on conflicts or trivial arguments or back bitching about people, but focus on how they can live an incredible life, how they can make an impact and grow their potential and live the purpose of their lives!

3.PAST MISTAKES
The past actually doesn’t exist, but some people like to keep them alive in their brains and like to keep pressing that PLAY button and keep listening to things that happened in the past.
By doing so they are wasting their precious attention on things that they can’t change, rather than on future opportunities that can bring them the positive change.
4.MINDLESSLY SCROLLING SOCIAL MEDIA
Generally, when successful people get online or on social media, predominantly on research and production, rather than simply on consumption!
Even if you are to consume any content, you need to curate your social media in such a way that you only consume the content in such a way that will improve your life, to learn a skillset deficiency and something that you know you want to do in life.
5.PLEASING PEOPLE
Reality is that people have their own agendas of life and you simply cannot please everybody.
Successful people are more focussed on becoming competent, on having high character, on being honest rather than going and trying to superficially please people. They don’t spend time worrying about who is offended, who doesn’t like them, because frankly, successful people understand that those things are completely out of their control. Other people’s opinion about us is entirely their business. Some people can call you amazing and the very next day they can call you evil!
People’s perception is mostly based on what is happening in their life at that point of time and their ability to assess a situation. Most of time, it actually has nothing to do with you.

6.COMPLAINING ABOUT CIRCUMSTANCES BEYOND THEIR CONTROL
Its pragmatic and not in our control- I cannot control the weather but I can control the navigation of my boat!
If you look at the political situation or the global economic situation or situations of macro nature, the best is to ignore that as its not going to really help you in anyway and you are wasting your precious time and energy on the things beyond your control. Instead work on how you can navigate my life situation through what’s happening. One has to pay attention to it but no point complaining about it. One has to be educated and aware about the events that may not directly impact you but have the potential to impact you indirectly

HOW TO TAKE ACTION WITH A DISTRACTED BRAIN

Have you been struggling to keep your focus on something that you know is important to you? Do you come into a situation when you know what you have to do but at the end of the day you are just not able to achieve it?
You realise that you do have the inherent motivation, but then, for whatever reason, that inherent motivation doesn’t translate into external action. Maybe even if it does, it maybe sporadic in nature. This is very common problem being faced by most of the people these days, even with the high performers!!
How many times have you woken up in the day with a very clear agenda for the day, but even before you get onto your work desk, something else or someone else takes away your attention. At times we get crippled by too much of a data and too many actions to be done.
That’s where the principles of how to work with distracted brain comes into action

  1. Understand the difference between external stimulus and internal drive.

Living in this society, we are constantly in a stimulated by the external environment. The way to counter this is to resist or completely separate yourself from these external stimuli and completely tune into your internal compass. Some ways to achieve it- have clear self-boundaries with others. Put  hard measures on when and how would you use your phones. There are certain hours of a day when you get to use your phones, for the other part of the day, keep your phones away. When you don’t see it, you will not intake that extra data in your mind. So, move away from all such things that you know may distract your brains so that you get to focus on a single task that you may want to complete at that particular time.

However, we also need a good external boundary. Since we live in a social setting, even if your boundaries are set, people will end up giving you data and information that you don’t need. There maybe some reality that you don’t wish to get associated with. This leads to our second principle-

2. In today’s set up it is a hardcore difficulty for us to have a straight focus of even 2 continuous hours over our given tasks.  This all has to be scheduled. Its more difficult when your decision-making responsibilities are more.

intensify your focus on all of that 30, 20 or 15 mins and do everything that is needed to deliver that task. To add, with introduction of AI tools in our work, a lot of work can now also be completed in a smaller window of time. This is the way of working smart. This states that if you reframe your focus, you will be able to utilise this focus a lot better. Focus now means that can you get a set of tasks done with all your intention in a given small period of time.

STOP BEING BASIC IN LIFE

The 1st iPhone was launched in 2007.

Would you buy this phone today if I offered you one?

It’s highly likely that you won’t!

Why?

Because it is VERY basic in comparison to the 2024 technology upgrades and evolution we have become accustomed to.

It’s now habitual to seek new technology; and anything less than that will be a complete “No – No.”

Now, think about this

When people will outright refuse an outdated, old and basic phone…

Why are they then settling for a “basic” life?

A Basic lifestyle.

Basic income.

Basic influence…

And everything else that is BASIC.

What if you had an opportunity to advance…

Wouldn’t you prefer that?

Average income, average performance, average lifestyle. Life is happening to them, not by them and not for them. As a result, they are constantly dealing with competition, stagnation, distress, confusion, ordinary life! Basic means that you have chosen to be the most basic version of you. You have the ability to be a superior and advanced version of you, but they chose to be their basic version. They are not getting paid, not getting big respect and not getting big trust. This is what happens when you don’t upgrade yourself.

Now let’s think of the advance version of oneself. Advanced communication, advanced presentation, advanced dressing, advanced education- not just academic education or degree but personal development education, spiritual education, business & financial education, leadership education, advanced conduct, advanced health, advanced thinking. How many of you actually feel older and look older than you actually are? You are going backward! One must get fitter with age, richer with age and wiser with age. There should be no other way to live! One must keep improving as we get older. Nothing should go backwards. One has to make our choices consciously. 90% of our society makes their choices unconsciously. Advanced sacrifices, advanced productivity has always resulted in amazing income and amazing performances and amazing lifestyle.

HOW TO COMMAND RESPECT AND NOT DEMAND RESPECT

There is a huge distinction between demanding respect and commanding respect.  One can demand respect with virtue of your positional authority. Commanding respect means that because of your personality and your conduct, one is able to attract the natural respect from the people.

Ways to command respect:

  1. Build the competency or mastery in one area where you have mastered a particular craft. Your respect will be massively enhanced in social as well as professional circles.
  2. Be mindful of acting subservient. So many people have been treated so badly by their parents, their children, their bosses, that they automatically by now drop their profiles especially in front of the people whom they perceive to be more powerful and successful than them. When we don’t have a strong self-image, we stop seeing ourselves worthy enough. Start to build a healthy self-image based on your true potential.
  3. Learn the use of nuanced language. It means that you are not just thinking in absolutes but also in relatives.
  4. People who automatically command respect and usually never overly nice, which means the outward display of niceness to win favors. Best way to build relationships is to let them evolve naturally rather than force relationships.
  5. Demonstrate reasonable level of open mindedness which demonstrates that you are a keen learner.
  6. To set some boundaries. Start saying no to toxic relationships, forced interactions and meaningless relationships. Highly respectable people place a lot of attention to their time and have boundaries. Set healthy boundaries to preserve your time and your sanity.
  7. Simply look more respectable. When you value what you have been given, others will follow. Do not listen to people who make you feel like you are pretentious, materialistic or superficial for wanting to look after yourself. This is the way you value what you have been given and this is how you will enhance the respect that you attract as well.